Are You In Need Of Rest?

It is so easy to get caught up in antisocial websites like Facebook and Twitter that we yearn for a break from it all. We think striving to enter His rest means striving to win comment wars and get the last say. We argue over the smallest little things and yet Paul wrote to avoid empty arguments about the law because is it unprofitable. Please note there is a monumental difference between a discussion and an argument.

A discussion allows for mutual encouragement. An argument needs a winner and a loser. Can you guess which is the unprofitable one?

Below I have written a few points for you to ponder over. Sort of a ‘Do I need to take a break test?’

Score yourself on the points below, and remember, this test is scientifically proven and accurate… Initial testing was done at the International Sarcasm Institute. Please contact them if you have any questions.

If 2 or less of the points apply to you, you are still ok.

If any 3 to 5 of the points apply to you, take a chill pill and go away for a long weekend away. Leave all electronic communication devices at home.

If any 6 to 10 of the points apply to you, you have moved from anointing to annoying…

If any 11 to 15 applies to you, please delete your Facebook account with immediate effect, throw your computer out the window and please for the love of all things pure and holy, don’t drink the koolaid at the next meeting…

Ready? Here goes:

1.  You comment on status updates by typing in tongues. Shakarakboomba…? Really?

2.  You have adopted some kind of spiritual sounding word as a middle name. Cornel superBlessed Marais. Mmm, can’t wait to have kids to do this for realsies!

3.  You have anywhere from 5 to 10 Bible verses ready to copy and paste to prove your point in any argument which makes you sound kinda like an audio bible stuck on repeat. Stuck on repeat. Stuck on repeat…

4.  YOU TYPE EVERYTHING IN CAPITALS SO PEOPLE CAN KNOW YOU MEAN BUSINESS!

5.  You try to express and convey your recent spiritual experience as a status update. “Whoaa! Surfing on a rainbow of forgiveness sprouting from the little toe of peace while being showered with joy petals! And how’s your afternoon been?”

6.  ”Speak the truth in love”, “You are so judgmental/angry/critical” and “Repent!” ranks at the top of your most used thread comments and replies. This is usually followed by a delete comment action or yet another block. You mentally tick your ‘Persecuted For The Gospel’ list.

7.  You spell ‘glory’ with extra A’s. ‘GLORAAAAAY!’

8.  You like certain pages only to keep tabs on the people you actually don’t like. This is called trolling. Don’t worry, Jesus loves trolls too. I think?

9.  You have more than one Facebook profile. No comment. This is just plain weird. Both of you.

10.  You comment on articles/notes/blogposts without first reading the article to get context. No, I am not going to explain it all to you in the comments just because you are to lazy to read.

11.  You can argue with many people on 5 different threads simultaneously. 8 on weekends? Impressive.

12.  You are unable to answer a direct question. You still didn’t answer my question? “In 2 Opinions 5:13 it says…”

13.  You struggle to discuss something rationally without taking it personally. Hissy fit, hissy fit, no further communication ever.

14.  You constantly post cute / super-spiritual pictures and them proceed to tag people who don’t want to be tagged in it. Yes, you know you who you are. Stop it.

15.  You create groups and add people to it without first asking if they want to be part of it. Of course I want to be a part of the 1000 Cheerleaders Like Jesus group! Life mission accomplished!

I sincerely hoped this made you chuckle and not merely offended. Seriously, I was just poking some fun. Be as individual as you like! Say what you like in the way you like. Express Christ in your unique way!

 Enjoy His Divine Life!

Cornel